分享一篇优秀的美国本科个人陈述

本文是一篇申请美国本科的文书，和申请英国硕士的文书不太一样，申请美国本科的文书更看重个人的经历、感悟和成长，而不太突出学生的学术能力。更喜欢讲故事，而不是罗列科研和实习。所以在评判美国文书时不能使用评判英国文书的标准。现将对本篇文书的分析陈述如下：

Personal Statement-Lifelong Learning

The white yarn slipped off my aluminium crochet hook, adding a single crochet to rows and rows of existing stitches, that looked to be in the form of a blob. Staring at the image of the little unicorn amigurumi lit up on the screen of my laptop, and looking back at the UMO (unidentified messy object) number five, I was extremely perplexed.

介绍自己学习钩针编织时的经历。

This had seemed so easy. Round 1, construct a magic circle with 6 single crochets. Done. Round 2 was an increase round resulting in a total of 12 stitches. Also done. The remaining rounds were blurred into hours and minutes that should have resulted in a little white creature in the likeness of a unicorn, but sitting on my desk (much like the four days before today) was a pool of tangled white yarn. It was not until day seven that a creature with a lopsided head whose horn was the only identifier of the mythical being emerged.

这看起来很容易。然而，本来我打算编织一个像独角兽一样的白色小生物，但到第四天我的成品却是一团纠结的白色纱线。最后，到第七天，终于织好了，但却只是一个头部歪斜的生物出现了，而唯一能看出它是只独角兽之处只是它的角。这是多么地失败。

Very much like learning how to crochet, my journey in forging my own path and finding a passion was confusing, messy and at times infuriating. Even in primary school, I had heard all the stories of individuals finding their own route in life. I had been told stories of those who found their passion at a young age and were exceptionally proficient at their craft, of those that abandoned their interests and pursued a lucrative career, even those who chose their dreams but regretted it afterwards. This weighed heavily on me, as I was determined to have a success story as many of my other family members had. The only problem was that I did not have a direction.

在我学习钩针的过程中，我发现自己所走的路是多么混乱，多么令人困惑。在小学的时候，我就听过所有关于个人找到自己人生道路的故事。有人告诉我，有些人在年轻时就找到了自己的热情，而且对自己的手艺非常精通，有些人放弃了感兴趣的东西，追求了一份有利可图的职业，甚至有些人选择了自己的梦想。等等， 相比他们，我感到非常迷茫和失败。

In the years following primary school, I stepped out of my comfort zone in a frenzy to find a passion. I joined the school orchestra where I played the violin, and a debate class to practice public speaking and become much more eloquent. At my ballet school, I branched out to contemporary and jazz dance. I stuffed myself with experience similar to an amigurumi engorged with batting. I found myself enjoying all of those activities but soon enough, I was swamped with extracurriculars. Just like the tangles of white yarn on my desk, I was pulled in all directions. I still felt lost. To make things worse, it seemed as if everyone else had found their path in life, and they had all become white unicorns while I was still doubting the stitch I just made.

于是，小学毕业后的几年里，我疯狂地走出舒适区，参加我喜欢的活动。我加入了学校管弦乐队，拉小提琴，参加辩论班，练习公开演讲，变得更加能说会道。在芭蕾舞学校，我学习当代舞和爵士舞。我积累各种经验，就像一个充满棉絮的手钩公仔。我发现自己很享受所有这些活动，但很快，我就被课外活动吞没了。就像桌子上的白色纱线一样，我被拉向四面八方。我仍然感到失落。更糟糕的是，似乎其他人都找到了自己的人生道路，他们都变成了白色的独角兽，而我还在怀疑我刚刚的针法。

It was not until high school that I realised that I could view this mission to find a passion from another perspective. While successfully completing a crochet project is an accomplishment itself, the motions of making slip knots, single or double crochets takes you on an adventure as well. The knots that I had encountered in my craft were evidence of my experiences and what shaped me as an individual. My exploration of various paths through detours may have sometimes resulted in roadblocks, but I continued to persevere and learn from my experiences, applying the skills that I have gained to future knots. The mini adventures that I went on were all crucial to me in the greater journey of life.

直到高中时，我才意识到，我可以从另一个角度来看待这个寻找自己热情的经历。虽然成功完成一个钩针项目本身就是一项成就，但制作滑结、单钩针或双钩针的动作也会让你经历一次次冒险。我在完成自己手艺过程中遇到的困难的绳结是我经历的证据，也是塑造我个人的因素。我在迂回中探索各种道路，有时可能会遇到障碍，但我继续坚持下去，从经验中学习，将我学到的技能应用到未来要编织的绳结中。在人生的更大旅程中，我所经历的小冒险对我来说都是至关重要的。

Through trial and error, the current adventure that I am on resonates the most with me, taking me down the path of service and environmental activism. However, I have learnt that no one path is static, and I can be on more than one path at a time. While I may only be halfway to the proportionate unicorn amigurumi that some others may have already achieved, I still have so much to learn and so much that I want to learn, and so my journey to grow continues.

通过反复试验，我之前的冒险经历最能引起我的共鸣，使我走上了服务和环保主义的道路。然而，我知道从没有一条路是静态的，我一次可以走多条路。虽然我的手钩公仔可能只完成了一半，而其他人可能已经完成独角兽手钩公仔，但我仍然有很多东西要学，有很多东西我想学，因此我的成长之旅仍在继续。

暗含自己将留学视为进一步成长之旅。

约翰霍普金斯大学招生委员会的点评：

Rozanne's essay showcases how pursuing a new hobby, crochet, is analogous to her larger efforts to find her passions. She's able to reflect that, while both processes may seem messy and confusing at first, putting in the requisite effort and time leads to greater and more meaningful outcomes. Rozanne's writing touches on several additional pieces of impact that she's been involved in, from dance to environmental activism, and hobbies like crochet. On an even greater level, though, the essay allows the admissions committee to see that she is someone who will take advantage of opportunities, engage with her community in a number of ways, push herself outside of her comfort zone, and be able to reflect on her own development. As we think about how she'll contribute to the larger Hopkins community, it's clear that while she may still be determining her exact passions, she'll dive right in and make the most of her time with us.

罗珊(作者)的文章展示了追求一种新的爱好即钩针是如何与她尝试找到自己热爱的东西相类似的。她能够反映出这一点，虽然这两个过程一开始看起来都很混乱，令人困惑，但投入必要的努力和时间会带来更大、更有意义的结果。罗珊的作品触及了她涉及的其他几项影响，包括舞蹈到环保活动，以及钩针等爱好。不过，在更大的层面上，这篇文章让招生委员会看到，她是一个会利用机会、以多种方式与社区接触、将自己推到舒适区之外、能够反思自身发展的人。当我们思考她将如何为更大的霍普金斯社区做出贡献时，很明显，尽管她可能仍在确定自己的确切热情，但不可否认，她会立即投入任何事情当中，充分利用在我们学校学习的时间。

本分析员的点评：

本篇文书亮点是作者从自己在一个小的活动即钩针编织中遇到的种种困难，引出自己曲折的人生。表明人生并非一帆风顺，而且往往落后于他人，使人感到气馁。而面对这种挫败感，作者并未消沉，而是积极参与各种社会活动，譬如加入了学校管弦乐队，拉小提琴，参加辩论班，练习公开演讲。在芭蕾舞学校，学习当代舞和爵士舞等等。虽然这样，她仍未摆脱迷茫，直到高中时，她豁然开朗。她意识到，她可以从另一个角度来看待这个寻找自己热情的经历。虽然成功完成一个钩针项目本身就是一项成就，但制作滑结、单钩针或双钩针的动作也会让自己经历一次次冒险。在完成自己手艺过程中遇到的困难的绳结是她经历的证据，也是塑造她个人的因素。她在迂回中探索各种道路，有时可能会遇到障碍，但她继续坚持下去，从经验中学习，将她学到的技能应用到未来要编织的绳结中。

通过反复试验，她走上了服务和环保主义的道路，并踏上留学的道路。她不再纠结于钩针编织是成功还是失败，而只在乎每一个小的动作和小的成功。只要在不断进步，就是一种成功，不是吗？